If you're looking for a great way to improve your teams communication skills, or to enhance a relationship, or increase your groups productivity; why not try creating a conflict? Believe me, it will absolutely help! Were you aware that every great achievement made by humankind since the beginning of time was created out of the ashes of a conflict? It's true! Conflict has been a major resource and ally for anyone desiring change. As a matter of fact the words "conflict" & "change" are synonymous. While I'm not really asking you to calculatingly create a conflict; I am asking you to view your conflicts in a different light. With the right attitude and appropriate communication skills your conflicts will become a powerful tool for creating positive change and growth. This rules applies to your family and business life. Conflict is inevitable because of human differences. This is very true in the business world where all of your problems come on two legs and can talk back. In the past twenty five years I have presented thousands of conflict resolution seminars revealing what I call, "The 5 Steps to Cooperative Resolution." While these steps are basically common sense, I've noticed that in many highly charged conflicts, common sense is not all that common. People know the rules, yet anger and frustration can cause us to forget our manners and trigger a conflict escalation. The first step in conflict resolution is to prevent the conflict from escalating. This is done most effectively by confronting the problem, person, or situation immediately. Never wait! The moment a conflict exposes its ugly face-confront! My experience has consistently shown me that most conflicts become overwhelming because they were not nipped at the bud. The longer you wait to confront the more intense and problematic your conflict will become. In many cases this will damage relationships. The second step is to set up a meeting in a neutral locale where together, you can brainstorm solutions. It's ideal to meet in a place away from where the problem originated. Negative emotions from the surrounding environment may cause the person to put up their guard making problem solving more difficult. Brainstorming solutions is the third step and must be approached with care. Remember your goal is not only to resolve, but to preserve the relationship. Here, your people skills are essential. Be sure to meet and greet the other party with an optimistic statement. This is the most positive way to begin a resolution process. Make sure you use "I" statements, and speak in an even, conversational tone. This will help to build trust and create a lot of rapport, essential for problem solving. Also, avoid bringing up the past and instead focus only on the topic at hand. This will also help the other person feel more comfortable and maintain their composure. Most of all constantly focus on areas that you have in common. Finding common ground in a resolution process allows you to find solutions you may have over looked. When you arrive at an agreeable solution, commonly called a "win-win," the fourth step is to get the agreement in writing. You may spend hours, days, or weeks in the resolution process yet, if the agreement is not put in writing all of your time will have been wasted. Remember if it's not in writing it never happened. Although a written agreement may not be appropriate in the family arena, it's still important for everyone to agree to the new terms. Finally as a special problem solving note: Never ask people to "feel differently," or "be different," or to "change their attitude," These are requests that you do not have the right to ask of any human being. As a fifth step remember, you are only allowed to request behavioral changes. The true magic of conflict lies not in trying to change others, but to use conflict as a stepping stone toward greater working relationships and more effective resolution skills. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/4426935