'Tis the season to be mingling. whether it's a neighbour's cocktail party, the office get-together, or the gathering of the family tribe, this is the time of year we all are expected to be social butterflies and connect with everyone ... whether we feel like it or not. It can be difficult, so here's some things you can do to make it work for you. *SCAN THE ROOM. When you're entering the party room, give it a quick scan to check out if you see anyone you know. If so, approach them. It's easier to start conversation with someone you've already met. If you work with them, you can ask about that project they're in charge of, or what they think about the latest company initiative. Build on the areas you have in common. *ASK THIS QUESTION. Here's the perfect question to ask if you're at a party and don't recognize a single face. Walk up to someone on their own, and begin by introducing yourself. "Hi, I'm Marion". If they don't reciprocate, prompt their response with, "And you're ...?" People will fill the gap with their name. Now comes the biggest tip you'll ever get. Ready? Ask them, "So how do you know (NAME YOUR HOSTS)?" This launches a whole area of possible conversation. They know them through work. "Oh really? And what do you do for company ABC?" Or they golf together. "How's your game these days?" Or they met on a vacation, "I just love cruises. Have you ever gone on one?" Take what they say, and ask a related question. Before you know it, you're having a conversation. *LEAVE THEM WANTING MORE. When mixing and mingling, remember the objective is to meet several people, not just one. You can always return back to someone for follow-up conversation, and when you do, if there was any sort of genuine connection, it will feel like you're coming home. You don't need to cover everything in just one encounter. Be sensitive to the fact that people may be trying to extricate themselves from your conversation talons, so let go gracefully before they start to squirm. Remember, they want to mix and mingle too, so let them. *LOSE THE BOOZE. Having a drink is fine. Having a bottle is not. No news flash there. Besides the obvious safety issues of drinking and driving, imbibing to excess at a family or office party puts you in a situation where you are out of control. Without control, we lose our boundaries and social veneer. We end up saying things we regret and engage in what I call, "career-limiting opportunities". Or we can irrevocably damage family relations when we tell that jerk relative what we really think (some things are best left unsaid). Sure, have a toast. Just know your limit and whatever you do, don't cross it. Get ready, get set, schmooze away! Enjoy the holiday season, the family, the colleagues and the parties. How you mix and mingle speaks to your social skills and ability to connect with others. Hopefully these tips will make the mingling all the easier. Happy holidays everyone! Until next time, Better communication, better business,better life, Marion Grobb Finkelstein Communication Specialist Keynote Speaker / Corporate Trainer / Author www.MarionSpeaks.com Marion@MarionSpeaks.com www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks © 2010 Marion Grobb Finkelstein WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR EZINE OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete tagline with it: Communications expert, author, professional speaker Marion Grobb Finkelstein teaches individuals and organizations across Canada and beyond, how to improve their businesses and their lives by changing their communications. Chat with her Facebook www.facebook.com/MarionSpeaks or sign up for her FREE weekly e-newsletter "Marion's Communication Tips" at www.MarionSpeaks.com